What does the gay fish joke mean
Mr. Fink, you are a gay lobbyist. What do you actually do all day?
Well, we destroy families, pervert children and adolescents, demoralize society, infiltrate the media, abolish freedom of expression - which is what happens at the moment. Personally, I particularly like to destroy Christian values. It's a pretty varied job.
That is, the gay world conspiracy ...
Yes, there really are. The great master plan that Gay agenda, the Rosa Nostra, the Homintern - call it what you will. It's all true We have been subverting all power structures in the world for many years. Our goal is world domination in order to enslave and finally destroy all heterosexuals.
When you think of the keyword “world conspiracy” you tend to think of Masons or the Illuminati.
Forget the Masons. When we've done our thing, you'll long for the Freemasons. We have diabolical powers that these ridiculous Hansel envy us for.
Can you give a few examples?
Certainly. The hurricane Katrina For example, who caused the flood in New Orleans in 2005: Only naive people still consider it a natural disaster. In truth, we gays created this deluge with the help of a simple street parade. Pastor John Hagee, the head of a Texas church and one of the most influential figures in US Protestantism, bravely brought this to light. We are also responsible for the tsunami disaster in Japan. Cindy Jacobs, a “respected prophetess” among Reformed Apostolic believers, has proved this very acutely. And it was we who, with the mere announcement of a gay and lesbian ski event, triggered the earthquake that devastated the New Zealand city of Christchurch in 2011. An anonymous website in Utah then revealed the truth.
So do you mainly produce earthquakes?
Our register of disasters is quite diverse. Cindy Jacobs, whom I mentioned earlier, also used her prophetic gift to catch us causing mysterious bird deaths in several US states. In 2011, our agents extorted the abolition of the "Don't ask, don't tell" rule¹, and the bird deaths had to be the direct result. So it wasn't all that mysterious.
Couldn't there have been other explanations as well?
In theory, yes. There were no bad voices at the time that the sensitive birds were more likely to have fatally crashed in swarms at the sight of the ugly polyester collection of the prophetess, and maybe that's even part of the truth. But the main suspicion ultimately stuck with us homos.
Either way. Who did you think designed your ugly blouses? [grins]
It sounds like such revelations are mostly made by Christians.
Yes, they are particularly clairvoyant there, you have to give them that. Every now and then, however, a Jewish rabbi comes across us while planning a smaller earthquake. And it was the Muslim President of the Gambia, Yahya Jammeh, who recognized in 2013 - and also declared before the UN General Assembly - that homosexual propaganda was one of the greatest dangers to humanity. There are amazingly astute people in all religions.
What else do you have in store?
For example diseases. We are happy to distribute them in a targeted manner. Plague, cholera, syphilis, hepatitis - actually all of them. We don't even have to talk about HIV here. It is now a truism that gay men even ruthlessly infect themselves just to pass viruses on to unsuspecting heterosexuals. You can read about how we caused the current Ebola epidemic in my blog.
Of course, these are all just the most spectacular gimmicks for general demoralization. Actually, it's a kind of nostalgia for our folk grand piano; After all, we triggered droughts, earthquakes and floods in the Middle Ages when we weren't busy poisoning wells or processing children's fat into flying ointment. You don't like to give up beautiful traditions.
What are the latest projects?
Our Realo wing works primarily on specific political projects. Attentive observers have noticed that we recently “infected” the Spanish government and completely undermined the judiciary in Ecuador. The FBI and CIA are finally firmly in perverted hands. Brian Camener, founder of the lobby campaign Mass resistance discovered this unexpectedly early. This is of course a great success, which will make the persecution of Christians easier for us in the future. This is exactly what Camener correctly recognized.
Persecution of Christians? In the USA?
American Christians have practically one foot in the Colosseum because of homosexual equality. More and more of them are now finding out with horror. Too late, of course. [laughs]
So far, that all sounds like a rather serious business. Are there any funny sides to the world conspiracy?
But yes. In addition to the dry political day-to-day business, we like to play a little joke. For example, do you know why Starbucks coffee tastes so good? We supply the branches with sodomite semen, which they use to flavor the café latte. Such projects are of course a lot of fun.
I beg your pardon?
You heard that right: sodomite sperm. Rev. James David Manning of the ATLAH World Missionary Church in Harlem found that out. Do you think someone like that would get away with such a crazy story in their church if they just made it up? By the way, we never thought that anyone would find out. Respect, Pastor!
We laughed a lot when we called one of our agents under the cover name "Tinky Winky" into the Teletubbies could smuggle in. A great move: gay propaganda on preschool television! Jerry Falwell, the head of a Baptist megachurch, has clearly recognized the clues: the purple suit, the handbag, the pink triangle symbol on the head - well, maybe we really exaggerated a little.
Yes, it was all very obvious.
And yet it took another eight years before Ewa Sowinska, the Polish government's child commissioner at the time, also became suspicious and ordered a psychological examination to check whether the series could be banned because it was at risk for young people. In Poland, on the other hand, our attempt to use Pooh the bear smuggle an exhibitionist hermaphrodite into the nursery.
No pants, no genitals.
Oh. That's pretty bold.
Yes, and it only works so well because most normal people are way too innocent. They don't even have the imagination to imagine what perversions such a cuddly teddy bear can transport.
You obviously enjoy using the modern media to get your propaganda out in the children's rooms.
It's not that new. As early as the 1950s, with the help of the ambiguous relationship between Batman and his underage “assistant” Robin, we specifically stimulated the children into homosexual fantasies. The book "Seduction of the Innocent", in which Fredric Wertham discovered this in 1954, was a bestseller at the time.
As for the children, as you can see, nowadays we are not so interested in their body fat, but rather want to spoil their innocent souls. But what am I talking about, that's what the opponents of the education plan tell you every day today.
Correct. So we come to another question: Doesn't a world conspiracy live primarily from its secrecy? Why did you decide to uncover everything now?
Well, it just can't be hidden anymore. The revelations have been increasing massively lately, in many parts of the world. Besides, we are unstoppable anyway, whether you know it or not.
Michael Swift had already rushed ahead in 1987 and had disclosed the gay agenda: “Tremble, straight pig, if we appear in front of you without our masks!” Why was he not believed?
Yes, some people took him seriously back then. But I believe that in times of crisis, people are particularly alert to evil activities. If I'm not mistaken, it has happened before in Germany that people only finally noticed at a time of political and social insecurity that a small, somehow degenerate minority was secretly infiltrating everything to prepare for their world domination, and that they in general was to blame for all the evils in the world, so that in the end only a great violent counter-attack could save the threatened majority.
I don't quite understand what you are alluding to.
Anyway, that's certainly not that important. History doesn't repeat itself. But excuse me; if you have no further questions, I'd like to say goodbye now. I still have a lot on the today Gay agenda. [smiles]
Aha, what's up?
I want to go to a planning meeting for a locust plague in East Westphalia with a few colleagues. On the way there we want to break up a few more marriages and take control of the local radio station.
Then I thank you for the interview and wish you every success.
Thank you, we will have it for sure. It's not the first world empire that we destroy. Har har har! [laughs demonically]
* * *
• On the occasion of this article, I have repeatedly referred to the as the "original text" of the Gay agenda The quoted essay by Michael Swift has been translated into German [Der Schwule Revolutionär] and the original English text is also included here [Gay Revolutionary].
• Betty Bowers Reveals The Homosexual Agenda
• The Heterosexual Agenda: Exposing The Myths
1 "Don’t ask, don’t tell": A duty of confidentiality for homosexual members of the army. Gays and lesbians were allowed - unlike before this regulation - to officially serve in the army, but had to remain "invisible". The superiors were not allowed to ask about the sexual orientation of the soldiers, who in turn were not allowed to talk about it.
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